Ollie D a child hood

5 Responses to Ollie D a child hood

1. lettf says:

   September 28, 2015 at 11:12 am

   Well done, I love your descriptive writing but try and keep it away from the story like piece of writing.
2. lettf says:

   September 28, 2015 at 11:12 am

   How can you up level your final sentence?
3. Fia says:

   September 28, 2015 at 11:13 am

   Well done, I think that your first sentence is good!
4. davio says:

   September 28, 2015 at 11:13 am

   Thanks Francesca!
5. Ameera says:

   September 28, 2015 at 11:14 am

   Well done amazing punctuation and description next time work on your connectives.

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