Ava – your story is delicious! It is imaginative and includes excellent descriptions of the sweet candies on your imaginary adventure. It is always a good idea to retread to make sure all the words are spelled correctly and the verb tense stays the same.
Keep up the good work.
Thank you Ava for writing for this 100 word challenge. Who wouldn’t want to have an adventure in Sweetland?! It really does sound wonderful, but it wonder what it’s like when the weather changes. If the sun was very hot, perhaps it would be very sticky and tricky to live in. I particularly like your sentence starters such as CURIOUSLY, FINALLY and SUDDENLY. Adventurous vocabulary choices help to make your writing really interesting for the reader.
I really enjoyed reading this imaginative story. Keep on reading and keep on writing!
Ava I love your candy adventure! Some great adjectives and verbs. I love the word ‘amble’.
To make this even better you could use commas after the words ‘Finally’ and ‘suddenly’ to turn these into adverbial clauses!
Ava – your story is delicious! It is imaginative and includes excellent descriptions of the sweet candies on your imaginary adventure. It is always a good idea to retread to make sure all the words are spelled correctly and the verb tense stays the same.
Keep up the good work.
Thank you Ava for writing for this 100 word challenge. Who wouldn’t want to have an adventure in Sweetland?! It really does sound wonderful, but it wonder what it’s like when the weather changes. If the sun was very hot, perhaps it would be very sticky and tricky to live in. I particularly like your sentence starters such as CURIOUSLY, FINALLY and SUDDENLY. Adventurous vocabulary choices help to make your writing really interesting for the reader.
I really enjoyed reading this imaginative story. Keep on reading and keep on writing!
Ava I love your candy adventure! Some great adjectives and verbs. I love the word ‘amble’.
To make this even better you could use commas after the words ‘Finally’ and ‘suddenly’ to turn these into adverbial clauses!